Hi, kids! Just wanna talk at you about how everyone’s favorite candidate, Liz Warren, is a testament to goodness and righteousness. Recently, “Our Liz” released her very own plan to pay for her version of the Medicare for All legislation that will definitely become law. There really is no way for it not to become law. If you don’t agree, why are you even a Democrat? Liz Warren, no relation to Warren G, is the only Democrat that matters, besides Pete Buttigieg, so please stop being disrespectful and start thinking more like Liz. Don’t disagree with Liz again, kids.
NEVER say you don’t want to do M4A.
Like, perhaps you don’t want to face the ire of the truck-nut buying mobs of socialism fighting, open carry, freedomloving, fuckyourtaxes, tea partyesque defenders of Democracy taking over the park strip in your town to fight “Soshalizum!” because you already did that shit a decade ago, and you were SO GLAD when it was fucking over? Could it also be that you don’t recall any of the leftists who are championing Medicare for All being in any way fucking helpful during the fight for Obamacare, because most were the exact opposite of helpful? I remember that too. But, please tone it down on the whole “Liz is wrong” thing, and don’t try saying it through your staffers. Don’t you dare try it.
Biden tried it this week to outcry and gnashing of teeth, which he absolutely deserved for some reason that I am unaware of, but doesn’t matter because Liz is The Truth.
Biden’s Deputy Campaign Manager Kate Bedingfield had some illegal words to say about Queen Liz and her plans. Awww! Lock her UP! Electric Chair!
Biden Deputy Campaign Manager Kate Bedingfield was quick to hit back at Warren’s plan, saying, “For months, Elizabeth Warren has refused to say if her health care plan would raise taxes on the middle class, and now we know why: because it does. Senator Warren would place a new tax of nearly $9 trillion that will fall on American workers.”
Bedingfield also called Warren’s plan “unrealistic” saying it hedges on “a complete revamping of defense, immigration, and overall tax policy” that leaves her with two choices, to “further increase taxes on the middle class or break her commitment to these promised benefits.”
“The mathematical gymnastics of this plan are all geared towards hiding a simple truth from voters: it’s impossible to pay for Medicare for All without middle class tax increases,” Bedingfield continued.
What did you just say? Um, that’s ILLEGAL as FUCK. Hi. You’re also not allowed to say Liz is lying about anything. Liz does not LIE. You lie about Liz’s plan not being extra awesome, probably because you’re beholden to the powers that be. Or maybe you’re just in the wrong party. Yeah.
Oh. Looks like you’ve always been a Democrat, Kate, and even though you’re not terribly old, you’ve been around since Edwards was running for President. Oops! I’m not seeing any evidence you’ve been purchased by a bank or any corporations, hmmm. Well, this is odd. I’m beginning to think the Warren method of figuring out who is a secret republican or is owned by a bank or multi-national corporation may have a flaw or two.
But that’s not the Point, KATE!
Liz already had graciously given you an opinion. Why would you waste your time forming your own? What’s WRONG with you?
Did you think having a different opinion than Liz Warren on how to do something was acceptable? Well, maybe you’re just a sell out to Big Pharma rather than The Banks? Saying it’s “unrealistic” to think that Liz can do Immigration Reform, End the Filibuster, Revamp the Military Industrial Complex, and completely overhaul Tax Policy by her lonesome is just ignoring her record of fighting. Didn’t she fight to get the highest settlements possible for women who got sick due to breast implants?
From Washington Post:
Oops! Ignore that please.
I’m sure those evil corporate baddies had Bruce Mann tied up in a dreary shack by the port and threatened to feed him real food if she didn’t do the bidding of those detestable scalawags at Dow. Sure, everyone says the complete opposite of what Liz says, but so what? They are republican plants. Liz does NOT LIE. You lie on Liz when you post quotes of people disagreeing with her. Also, it’s not that Liz was lying when she said she always worked for the “little guy” in her speeches. These breast implant “Victims” were not “Guys” at all. They were just women, and women don’t even matter, so shut the fuck up. It’s Liz’s turn.
Liz had some thoughts on Biden because of the things his staff said about her.
Elizabeth Warren swatted back at Joe Biden’s criticism of her $21 trillion Medicare-for-All plan Friday, accusing him of “running in the wrong presidential primary.”
“Democrats are not going to win by repeating Republican talking points,” the Massachusetts senator said in Des Moines, Iowa. “So, if Biden doesn’t like that, I’m just not sure where he’s going.”
No, I’m not sure where the fuck YOU’RE going. Disputing your math and the likelihood you’ll be at all successful in herding enough cats to get this done, especially with the funding sources you chose, IS NOT A REPUBLICAN TALKING POINT. It’s Common Sense.
Let’s hear from a reasonable Republican.
Warren is also terribly cavalier about the impact that her plan has on working- and middle-class people. Asked what all the health-care insurance company workers would do if their business was outlawed, she blithely said they could go work in other areas of insurance— as if thousands upon thousands of jobs are waiting to be filled with refugees from health-care insurance companies.
Well, why should Queen Liz worry about people losing their health insurance jobs? They work for The Devil! Those people who were single parents or low wage workers that took themselves back to school to learn a specialized and necessary skill that helps the system we DO have function properly? Yo, they should have known better. Besides, it’s not “thousands upon thousands” of jobs we will lose. It’s more like 2,000,000.
Massachusetts Senator and Democratic presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren agreed that her “Medicare for All” plan would result in about 2 million lost jobs, calling it “part of the cost issue,” and stating “should be part of a cost plan.”
Oh, look! Just some collateral damage in the form of nearly a percent of all jobs lost nationwide. Liz is so clever! While Trump is bragging about the low unemployment rate and how many jobs were created under his administration (He takes credit for personally creating those jobs), Liz can tell The People how many she would fire from their jobs to get that unemployment rate going back up.
This is starting to seem difficult. Was Obamacare this difficult?
Hey, do you remember how we had to wait for the recounts so that Franken could be seated. This brings to mind how they had to damn near carry Ted Kennedy, who was ON HIS DAMN DEATHBED, into the chamber to make that historic vote that John McCain wasn’t Maverick enough to make and save him the trouble? Thank you, Senator Kennedy. You did the damn thang.
Warren wasn’t a Senator at that time, so maybe she was too busy being a fucking nerd somewhere at Harvard with her law students to know how close we came to a big fucking fail. I’m sure she was whisper yelling lectures at those bright eyed young pups about how to research and reason, she was planning the CFPB, and of course, admiring herself for being the smartest and most integrity having entity that ever was or will be. She can’t fail with M4A.
Liz Warren doesn’t fail, don’t you see?
You simply failed to understand how much better Liz is than Obama at getting huge structural change. She will yell “Fight!” and pump her tiny power-fist in the air, and everything will simply fall into place. And if you can’t find a way to agree with that, maybe you’ve simply been paid for your opinion. Doing things Liz doesn’t like means you are C.O.R.R.U.P.T.
We can apply this belief to the current campaign season, to her time as a College Professor, as well as her time as a Senator in the Obama administration. So, let’s take a look back at The Wonderful Lizzie Of All and recount more ways of how awesome she is compared to everyone else. It shouldn’t take much longer for you to see why Liz is constantly implying that her colleagues are corrupt. I mean, they disagree with her daily. Tsk Tsk!
Once upon a time, a woman named Hillary Clinton asked The People to name a corrupt vote she had ever taken. Along came Liz Warren to remind The People not to trust that mean old nasty corporate whore-bag, Hillary Clinton.
Sen. Elizabeth Warren, D-Mass., once noted Clinton changed her position on a controversial bankruptcy bill after accepting campaign contributions from the financial industry. The bill, which made it more difficult for Americans to obtain bankruptcy protections from lenders, was sought by credit card companies.
“She has taken money from the groups, and more to the point, she worries about them as a constituency,” Warren, then a Harvard University law professor, said in 2004.
Watching her on Moyers sure brings back warm memories, eh? Burgers and French Fries with Hilary, smart discussion, and a partner against the coming doom. Such a nice story showing how Hillary came through due to her op-ed, and got that shitty bankruptcy bill vetoed so it wouldn’t harm women and children. It was so clever of Liz to set this story up showing how awesome Hillary had been, and then knifing her in back over voting to move a bill forward.
See, Hillary actually fixed the bill in the end, but Liz had already accused her of diabolical activities, so this clip and the smears within, were used to bolster the claim that Hillary was corrupt in 2016. Hillary should have asked Liz for permission to make an agreement with her colleagues to protect child support and alimony payments in exchange for her vote to move the bill forward. Warren was not in error. You have made the error of doubting Liz’s mind reading skills. How dare you?
[2/7/2016 Update: Hillary Clinton responded to Senator Warren’s story Sunday morning on ABC’s This Week with George Stephanopoulos. Clinton said that she voted for the 2001 bankruptcy legislation because she was able to get an amendment into the bill that protected the child support or alimony payments for single mothers. As part of that deal, she says, she had to vote for the bill.
You may be thinking, “Well, Warren didn’t actually know what Hillary was thinking, so when Hill voted, Liz shouldn’t have automatically assumed it was because she was paid for her vote. WTF?” You would be thinking that, and you would be…WRONG. HILLARY WAS PAID! PERIOD! Because Liz Warren cannot be “mistaken” on anything ever. You mistakenly thought Hillary might have known her own motivations better than Liz. Stop that. It’s a Sin.
Obama was known for committing sins against Liz, the One and Only. Obama would say the most terrible things to Good Queen Elizabeth, things such as; “No.” and “You’re wrong about TPP.” not to mention this devastating nugget, “No, really, you don’t know what you’re talking about when it comes to the TPP, Liz.”
I told you it was bad.
Don’t you worry, she got him back when she attacked him over speaking fees. Here is an audio clip of Liz sounding like a left-wing Glenn Beck as she discusses the “snake that slithers” and “shadowy figures” as she rails against money in politics.
Bernie also had something to say, calling it “unfortunate” he was giving the speech, yet somehow Bernie didn’t imply that Obama was shady.
Bernie simply really fucking hates Wall Street and doesn’t want anyone normalizing their disgusting industry, and he breaks into his stump speech whenever questioned. But when you compare the two videos, it’s remarkable how much worse Liz looks. Cause I legit cannot stand Bernie Sanders and his one track mind. But Liz sounded like some shitty high-school frenemy who waits until you move away to tell all of your friends you were a dirty slut-face who tried to sleep with their boyfriends. My God. She’s worse than Bernard.
It’s so weird when Bernie isn’t the one I find disappointing. Oh, well. At least Bernie never changes.
Just remember everything I taught you about agreeing with Queen Liz, and don’t you ever think for yourself again!